In the spring of 1969 my mother decided it was important that all six of her children go to confession so we could receive the holy sacrament on Easter Sunday. Most of us had not been to confession for some time. Kevin was a freshman in high school and he hadn’t been to confession since last year when he was confirmed. Normally confession was very crowded prior to Easter and the lines were very long. The church always seems to be hot and people regularly passed out waiting in line. Priests seemed to be very liberal during these times. Confessions were usually hurried. I think no matter what kinds of sins you committed; venial or mortal as long as you hadn’t murdered someone you got ten hail marys and ten our fathers and say a good act of contrition and you were out of there.
My four sisters lined up on one side of the confessional and Kevin and I on the other side. Most confessions seemed to be heard in 3-5 minutes. Kevin was in the box for 45 minutes! People were changing lines and my sisters were staring me down. When he finally emerged his face was flush and he looked visibly troubled. I whispered to him, “What the hell had you in there for 45 minutes?” He looked up at me with a perplexed expression on his face and said, “I can’t talk about it.” He was waiting in the parking lot when I got out of the church. I spoke to him again and inquired how he could possibly be in confession for all that time? He said the priest told him not to discuss it and in the next breath he asked me if I knew what a Novena was? I asked him what he told the priest and again he was reluctant to give me any information. I convinced him that when the priest said he shouldn’t talk about his confession that it didn’t include brothers, that brothers were exempt. Kevin seemed to accept this explanation and proceeded to repeat the conversation he had with the priest but first he asked what excommunicated meant.
Kevin confessed to stealing from department stores. The priest asked him to be specific so he told him about his Christmas shopping spree this past season. It consisted of going to the Menlo Park Mall with his then best friend, Pat Selvaggio, and raiding Bambergers, Pennys, and several sporting good stores, not to mention the shoe stores. Kevin lifted full length suede coats for my sisters and a pea coat for me (he’s so generous towards his siblings). He swiped a golf bag for our dad and some Chrystal for our mom. Of course the stealing Santa was good to himself confiscating over 20 albums, a 16 foot aluminum canoe with paddles, and a matching pea coat. He also confessed the dozen of times he’d walk out of a restaurant without paying the bill or bowling for hours and never paying(these minor infractions didn’t even count as far as he was concerned). Finally the priest inquired what the most valuable item Kevin had ever stolen. Happy to oblige the question and like a farmer proud of his crop he announced he had stolen a new motorcycle right out of the showroom in Boundbrook and that he had also been an accomplice in stealing a 1967 GTO. The concerned father then asked Kevin his age as he must have been perplexed as to why a 15 year old was not licensed would steal a motor vehicle….Like that would stop Kevin from driving. Kevin put more miles on my Triumph Motorcycle under the age of 17 than most motocross riders do their entire career. Finally the priest got around to asking Kevin if he had any improper thoughts. Kevin is truly naïve and didn’t understand the question. The father rephrased the question and asked him if he thought of acting on impulses with the opposite sex. Again the question did not register with Kevin but he did understand the priest was hinting about sex. Kevin being the kind soul he offered to help the struggling priest out here and proceeded to tell, in some detail, his sexual escapades with the opposite sex. He mentioned having sex in the funhouse in Seaside Park and how he and his namelesss friend would climb to the second story of their friends house to have sex in her room while her parents were downstairs. The most difficult part here for the priest was convincing Kevin that these acts were wrong and that his intentions had to be never to commit them again or he couldn’t be forgiven. Talk about taking the wind out of your sails. Kevin was under the distinct impression that no matter what you did as long as you went to confession it was OK and intention to repeat the acts should have no bearing on being absolved. I’m not sure he ever understood that concept.
Full knowing our sisters would tattle and tell our parents of the mysterious 45 minute confession we needed to come up with a plan to explain the situation. Our dilemma was we couldn’t think of anything that would sound believable. The good news is that the priest didn’t ask Kevin for his name so his Novena and threat of excommunication were just that ….threats. Nothing for Kevin to worry about!
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